I was caught off guard without an escape plan. Luckily, I wasn’t really in danger.
So last night, I was at church for Praise Team practice, and we were waiting for people to arrive. In the middle of some music talk I heard loud banging noises and yelling. It happened so fast. I froze. I didn’t know what to do and I couldn’t figure out what was happening. Then I realized it was the people we were waiting for letting us know they’re here since the door was locked. Myyyy goodness, I panicked for about 10 seconds and then I panicked even more because I realized I don’t have a plan for that. I have plans for chainsaw murderers at work, for creepy children in the desert, and for burglars in the middle of the night. But I DON’T have a plan to escape anything at church. That whole sentence seems really stupid. Why would I need to escape from church? Well it’s almost 2012 and people are crazy so I ALWAYS need a plan of escape from anywhere. One day I should write a book on clever escapes from random places. Don’t steal that idea, because I’m pretty sure my escape ideas are better than your escape ideas so your book would just suck and people would be like WOW I wish someone would write a good escape novel, and then my book would come out and they would be all ohhh yes! finally, I have been waiting for this all my life. Like that song by someone I can’t remember. Well anyway, I realized that on the stage at church there are a lot of escape routes, all with doors that led outside, so I’m pretty much fine as long as I can run faster than the person who is causing me danger. Or I could just hit them with a Bible, because it’s also called a sword so I’m pretty sure that would really suck to get hit in the face with a Jesus sword.