I have a serious fear of breaking my own neck. I’m actually afraid to pop my neck. You know how some people pull their neck to the side and it pops so loud you start to dial 911? Yeah, I can’t do that. My husband pops his neck like that all the time and I’m just waiting for the day that he falls limp and I’ll have to tell my paralyzed husband “I told you so”. I banned him from doing it while driving, because that’s just putting both of our lives at risk.
In the shower a couple of days ago, I had a neck pain and I felt like I needed to pop my neck. So I tried, but I just couldn’t get it to pop because I felt like if I pulled any further I would paralyze myself. Then I started thinking what would happen if I did break my own neck? Chris would call 911 but then they would think he did it because I would probably be the first person in the history of ever to break her own neck with her own hands. That would be so awful knowing that Chris didn’t do it, but there I was dead or paralyzed or comatose or something that made me unable to tell the cops that I did this to myself. So, I just didn’t pop my neck. There was too much at risk.
Oh, one more irrational fear? I’m highly afraid that my nose will get shoved into my brain. I think Arnold Schwarzenegger did that once in a movie where he hit the guy with the heel of his hand in the nose and it shoved something into his brain and he died instantly. So, basically I try really hard not to get hit in the nose with stuff. Once Chris and I were goofing around and he accidentally hit my in the nose with his arm in sort of an upward motion and I freaked out and he was like what the heck is wrong with you, you would have to get hit really hard for a hit in the nose to kill you. People break their nose all the time. And I was like, no, it’s all about angles, Chris. You don’t know how much it would take to kill me through my nose. This is not a laughing matter. And then he was like ok crazy lady and then I was like LISTEN you’re the hulk, you could probably thump me in the nose and I would die, so just BE CAREFUL WITH ME.
Some of that was exaggerated, but I’m not really sure which parts because when your life is being threatened sometimes you forget things because you block out the trauma.