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Every marriage needs a healthy dose of fear

When I recently wrote about how badly I want a kitten, I really didn’t think Chris took my kitten threat seriously. However, yesterday he told me that he has stress because every day when he comes home he doesn’t know if there is going to be a kitten here. I am not really sure where or how this came up in our conversation over dinner, but it did and it was wonderful. It’s good to have something in your life to keep you on your toes. I’m home alone all day, so it is fully possible that I will find a kitten on my lunchtime run, or maybe I’ll be buying dog food at the pet store and they’ll be having a kitten sale. I actually found a kitten when we were on vacation in California a few days ago. I was mid conversation in the kitchen with a couple family members, and I saw this little black and white ball of adorable walk across the sitting area outside and I said Ohhh Kitten, and walked outside. I fully expected the cat to run from me because they usually do, but this one meowed a sad little sound and let me play with it! It was so cute and sweet and you could tell that it recently had a human family because you could see the indentation in it’s fur from a collar. I would pet it, and it would roll back on it’s back and play with me and even today I am reminded of my little furry friend when I look at the scratches all over my hand. Cats are fiesty like that. They’re like oh I love you, pet me but don’t get to comfortable, remember I have sharp claws, see? I told Chris I needed to find a way to smuggle it on the airplane. I could just zip it up in my giant purse and be like shhhh kitty, just stay here under the seat, we’ll be home soon. And then we would live happily every after.

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I honestly considered killing him, but then I would have had to get out of bed

I think Otis the cat is depressed.

Why else would he wander the house at night meowing for no reason? Seriously. All. Night.

Recap: recently I moved back home with my parents and brother and sister. Also, 2 other cats and a giant dog. Otis has been staying in the main house, while I live in the RV behind the house. Well, Otis and the other cats fight constantly. I’m pretty sure they talk crap to each other as the pass each other in the halls. Like “hey, this is my hall, find your own place to stare at nothing” and then I’m pretty sure one cat gets mouthy as she’s walking away and then Otis is like “WHAT!? say that to my face!” And she does, and then fur is a’flying. Literally. Fur everywhere.

ANYWAY, my mom started complaining that Otis has been meowing ALL night, so I suggested that he missed sleeping in my bed, so I’ll just start keeping him in the RV with me. He didn’t miss me. No, he meowed all night. First night, I got up and took him in the house at about 2:45 am. Second night I left him in with me and suffered through it. All the blinds in the RV were jacked up (if you have a cat, you KNOW what they do to blinds), Harold was knocked to the floor, I was yelling things like “WHY CAN’T YOU JUST SHUT UP! OTIS, COME HERE! SHUT UUUUUUP”. I’m pretty sure I almost cried. If that wasn’t enough to keep me from sleeping, Jake was restlessly watching Otis’ every move and he kept jumping on the bed, off the bed, on the bed, off the bed, if Otis got on the bed, Jake fought him until he jumped off. ALLLLL NIGHT.

The next morning, I walked past Otis while he was sleeping peacefully, and just started talking to him saying things like “hey, are you sleeping good? don’t let me wake you or anything. Oh, does my talking bother you? I would hate to keep you from your beauty sleep, I guess you’re sleeping all day so you have the energy to stay awake all night and meow and keep me awake.” Then I realized I was talking to a cat, and he was blankly staring at me because he’s a cat, and understood nothing.

So basically, I’m really exhausted right now and I’ve got constant sinus pressure becuase I think Texas pissed off mother nature and she was like HA! No Rain For You! Probably.

Big Dog and a Headless Deer

So, lately my brain has been to full of work stuff to be creative on it’s own so I decided if I just open up a blank post and start writing then maybe the creativity will begin to flow. Wish me luck or something.

Let’s start with what’s happening in my life: I moved into my parents RV that sits next to their house for a few months. I know you might think living with your parents, 19 year old brother, and 12 year old sister at 25 years old would be a nightmare, but actually it’s nice. I’ve been away from them for awhile and it’s cool to get to hang out and see them everyday. I get to see my mom and sister every morning before work. I like it. Every morning I wake up, throw on a robe and some flip flops and head inside for a shower and to brush my teeth. This is going to SUCK when it’s freezing outside or raining and I’m walking through mud. I clearly didn’t think this through. I need rain boots and a waterproof robe. hmmm.
Moving on…. When I moved, I brought along The Jake and Otis. Otis stays in the house with the other 2 cats and the gigantic Arthur:

This is Arthurs head. Notice the human head below it. Perspective. Now you have it. That's a giant dog.

Despite having 2 cats of his own to torture in the house, he is obsessed with getting Otis to play with him. Otis does not want this to happen. In fact, he made that clear when he took his claw to Arthurs nose. Arthur was not deterred by the bloody nose.
So Otis just finds really high places to hang out in the house and then taunts Arthur by hanging is head over the edge of whatever he’s on and looking down at Arthur. It’s pretty funny.

Also, this is sitting outside of the door to the RV:

um. Yep. That’s a headless deer.

I promise, my parents aren’t that weird. Or at least I didn’t think they were. However, in their defense I’m pretty sure Bambi was used for bow and arrow target practice and apparently whoever was shooting is a pretty good shot because his whole freakin head is missing. Or maybe Arthur the giant dog attacked the plastic deer trying to protect the family. Eh, your guess is as good as mine. If I was a deer or a burglar, I would probaly not come try to start trouble at this house because we’ve got headless deer and a giant dog up in here.

Aches, Pains, and Chemical Burns

Staining Concrete is easy.  Prepping concrete to stain is NOT.
I recently spent a weekend prepping and staining concrete. Concrete that was poured and built upon 26 years ago.  I would just like to thank the builders who were reckless and got overspray all over the floors and didn’t give a think that maybe one day some future owner would want to rip up the carpet and possibly stain the concrete below.  I spent 8 hours Saturday afternoon using adhesive remover and paint thinner and let me tell you…that stuff BURNS!!!! It doesn’t even have to touch your skin for you to know how much it burns.  Even with chemical resistant gloves on, your hands feel like they’re on fire and your fingers swell up. Water doesn’t help, it makes it burn worse.  There were also several “oh *$@*#!” moments as some of the chemical gets on your skin and you make a mad dash to the sink while frantically trying to get the fiery gloves off your hands without getting the chemical on another part of your body.
The plus side? I’m probably almost a ninja now since I was forced to realize how much pain I could handle, because sometimes you just couldn’t get the gloves off fast enough and you literally just have to stand there and let your body burn.  It’s like torture and I’m not even exaggerating.

It’s been 2 weeks and I STILL have burns on my skin.  They look like bubbly blisters.  Awesome.

Before! With Otis the Guardian Cat.

 

After! With The Jake trying to find a place to hide his bone

I think I forgot how to be funny

Seriously, my brain is busted.  It doesn’t work.  I just realized I have been talking to someone at work, and had NO idea what his name is, only to find out that it’s someone in charge of stuff and I had NO idea.  Now I’m trying to think back to every conversation I’ve EVER had with him to make sure I haven’t said anything stupid.  Who knows, I’m sure I have.  Holy crap and was I WAY off on this guy.  Thought he was short – he’s tall.  Beard? Nope, bald.  What the heck! Wow..I just need to start paying attention I guess. 

CPR cat, you are not alone.

other reasons why I’m my brain is busted? hm…I was making a phone call and when they answered it scared me because I forgot I was on the phone and then I stumbled through my question.  brain = broken….I remember there WERE other moments in this last week where I thought “oh…girl…you are an idiot’…just can’t remember what they were.

Do you have any examples of my brain being broken this week?  What about yours?  Please share….