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It’s all fun and games until somebody gets bit by a fish

Actual conversation with my husband. Actually, it’s a mostly one sided conversation where Chris just gives me strange looks because I am irrational. Obviously.

Chris: I almost bought the movie Jaws

Me: We don’t need that movie

Chris: Why not?

Me: I’m already afraid of the ocean. I don’t need anymore help with that

Chris: What? You’re afraid of the ocean, but you want to go to the ocean for vacation in August?

Me: Yes.

Chris: So, you aren’t getting in the ocean?

Me: A little

Me: I’m more likely to get in the ocean than I am to get in a lake

Chris: (strange look)

Me: I’m afraid of the lake

Chris: (more strange look but now it looks like if maybe he’s wondering what he got himself into with this marriage)

Me: I’m afraid of fish. I’m afraid they’ll bite me. And those hidden underwater trees? Those freak me out.

Chris: Is that why you don’t like to eat catfish?

Me: No, it’s already dead and can’t stab or bite me. I just don’t like to eat fish.

Chris: (continued strange looks)

Me: Also, I believe that there are snakes in lakes

Chris: There ARE snakes in lakes

Me: SEE?? I’m not getting in the lake. I was tortured as a child. The only way I’ll get in the lake is if I’m thrown off the tube. Which is why I’m really good at tube wars. I can stay on for a crazy long time. But when I get thrown off I float on my back and/or kick my legs and move my arms as much as possible so I scare the bitey animals.

Me. It’s a survival skill.

Chris: Why are we talking about lakes? We don’t even have plans to go to the lake.

Me: Stop judging me.


Next time, I’m stealing a squirrel.

Ok…stealing is not the right word.  Relocating.  Next time, I’m relocating a squirrel.  Preferrably a pregnant one so I can get like a twofer…or a however- many-babies-a-squirrel-has-fer. Yes, this is another blog about California: On the side of Pacific Coast Highway, we saw a sign for “Elephant Seal Lookout Point”.  Heck yeah! Let’s look at some giant seals!  What we didn’t expect was all the coastal squirrels that would greet us as we got out of the car:

yum. I bet he was “droppin it like it’s hot” after this

Should be a commercial. Starring Martin the Squirrel.

curious little squirrel.. i should have snatched him up


Oh yeah, Elephant Seals…That’s why we pulled over right? I guess I should include a picture…

 UPDATED:  SunDrop’s new commercial is about Squirrels and Sundrop.  WHAT!? How did they NOT contact me about this? HEY, SUNDROP!! YOU SHOULD HAVE USED MY SQUIRREL PICTURES FOR YOUR COMMERCIAL..or me because I LOVE Sundrop.  Anyway, I hope one day sundrop is available everywhere and that all people in the world get a chance to taste the wonderful goodness of Sun Drop (diet, or regular).  This is my wish for the world.  Also that they all know Jesus.