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Every marriage needs a healthy dose of fear

When I recently wrote about how badly I want a kitten, I really didn’t think Chris took my kitten threat seriously. However, yesterday he told me that he has stress because every day when he comes home he doesn’t know if there is going to be a kitten here. I am not really sure where or how this came up in our conversation over dinner, but it did and it was wonderful. It’s good to have something in your life to keep you on your toes. I’m home alone all day, so it is fully possible that I will find a kitten on my lunchtime run, or maybe I’ll be buying dog food at the pet store and they’ll be having a kitten sale. I actually found a kitten when we were on vacation in California a few days ago. I was mid conversation in the kitchen with a couple family members, and I saw this little black and white ball of adorable walk across the sitting area outside and I said Ohhh Kitten, and walked outside. I fully expected the cat to run from me because they usually do, but this one meowed a sad little sound and let me play with it! It was so cute and sweet and you could tell that it recently had a human family because you could see the indentation in it’s fur from a collar. I would pet it, and it would roll back on it’s back and play with me and even today I am reminded of my little furry friend when I look at the scratches all over my hand. Cats are fiesty like that. They’re like oh I love you, pet me but don’t get to comfortable, remember I have sharp claws, see? I told Chris I needed to find a way to smuggle it on the airplane. I could just zip it up in my giant purse and be like shhhh kitty, just stay here under the seat, we’ll be home soon. And then we would live happily every after.

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I honestly considered killing him, but then I would have had to get out of bed

I think Otis the cat is depressed.

Why else would he wander the house at night meowing for no reason? Seriously. All. Night.

Recap: recently I moved back home with my parents and brother and sister. Also, 2 other cats and a giant dog. Otis has been staying in the main house, while I live in the RV behind the house. Well, Otis and the other cats fight constantly. I’m pretty sure they talk crap to each other as the pass each other in the halls. Like “hey, this is my hall, find your own place to stare at nothing” and then I’m pretty sure one cat gets mouthy as she’s walking away and then Otis is like “WHAT!? say that to my face!” And she does, and then fur is a’flying. Literally. Fur everywhere.

ANYWAY, my mom started complaining that Otis has been meowing ALL night, so I suggested that he missed sleeping in my bed, so I’ll just start keeping him in the RV with me. He didn’t miss me. No, he meowed all night. First night, I got up and took him in the house at about 2:45 am. Second night I left him in with me and suffered through it. All the blinds in the RV were jacked up (if you have a cat, you KNOW what they do to blinds), Harold was knocked to the floor, I was yelling things like “WHY CAN’T YOU JUST SHUT UP! OTIS, COME HERE! SHUT UUUUUUP”. I’m pretty sure I almost cried. If that wasn’t enough to keep me from sleeping, Jake was restlessly watching Otis’ every move and he kept jumping on the bed, off the bed, on the bed, off the bed, if Otis got on the bed, Jake fought him until he jumped off. ALLLLL NIGHT.

The next morning, I walked past Otis while he was sleeping peacefully, and just started talking to him saying things like “hey, are you sleeping good? don’t let me wake you or anything. Oh, does my talking bother you? I would hate to keep you from your beauty sleep, I guess you’re sleeping all day so you have the energy to stay awake all night and meow and keep me awake.” Then I realized I was talking to a cat, and he was blankly staring at me because he’s a cat, and understood nothing.

So basically, I’m really exhausted right now and I’ve got constant sinus pressure becuase I think Texas pissed off mother nature and she was like HA! No Rain For You! Probably.